Slim Pickins

Imagine being asked to open up for an old school hip-hop DJ. Y’know, one of the innovators, the originators, the architects. Pretty good deal, right? An opportunity not to be missed.

Now imagine being given a list of tracks you can’t play. Fair enough, you think. Gotta leave some crowd pleasers and ol’ stand-bys for the big man.

But what if the list looked like the one below (never mind that there are some wack tracks on there)? What you gonna play now, Mr. Hotshot Opener?

B-Boy Traks
1. Mexican – Babe Ruth
2. Big beat – Billy Squire
3. Apache – Bongo band
4. Seven Minutes of Funk – family
5. Mardi gras – Bob James
6. Pump It up – Trouble funk
7. Fusion Beats – Tramp
8. Get up and dance – Freedom
9. Just began – Jimmy Castor
10. Give it up and turn it loose – James Brown
11. Listen to me – Baby Huey

Old Rap/Hip Hop
1. All Tupac songs
2. All Naughty by nature songs
3. Rappers Delight – Sugar hill gang
4. The Adventures of GMF GMF
5. The Message – Grandmaster Flash
6. Planet Rock – Afrika Bambaataa
7. All LL Cool Jay Songs
8. Mic Checka – Das Efx
9. Take it Personal – Gangstarr
10. All Eric B and Rakim Songs
11. It takes 2 – Rob Base
12. Jump Around – House of Pain
13. Time for some action – Redman
14. The choice is yours – Black sheep
15. All Public Enemy songs
16. All Tribe called Quest songs
17. All Krs 1 songs
18. Humpty Dance – Digital underground
19. Ive got the power- Snap
20. All Cypress Hill songs
21. All Run Dmc songs
22. All Dela Soul songs
23. Jam on it – Neucleus
24. Treat Em right – Chubb Rock

Classic (R+B)
1. Im coming out – Diana Ross
2 Got to be real – Cheryl Lynn
3 I cant wait – Nu Shooz
4 More bounce to the ounce – Zapp
5 Genius of love – Tom Tom Club
6 Hot stepper – Ini Kamoze
7 All Michael Jackson songs
8 Groove is in the heart – Deelite
9 Give it to me baby- Rick james
10 Freakout – Chic
11 Knee Deep – Funkadelic
12 All Prince songs
13 We are family – Sister Sledge
14 Toms Diner – Suzanne Vega
15 All night long – Mary Jane Girls
16 Outstanding – Gap band
17 Hold On – En Vogue
18 Before I let go – Maze
19 Bounce rock roll skate – Vaughn Mason
20 Square biz – Teena Marie
21 A Dj saved my life – Indeep
22 Good Times – Chic
23 Another one bites the dust – Queen
24 All Madonna songs
25 All Donna Summer songs

New Rap
1. All 50 Cent
2. Chingy Rite there
3. Magic Stick – Lil Kim
4. Get Low – lil John
5. The Benjamins (all versions)
6. Party and Bullshit – Rah Digga
7. Like a Pimp – David Banner
8. The Jump Off – Lil Kim
9. Do that dance – Baby
10. Back that ass up – Juvenile
11. Bling Bling – BG
12. Pump It up – Joe Buddens
13. Excuse me – Jay Z
14. Roc the mic – Freeway
15. Beautiful – Snoop Dog
16. Vivarin Thing – Q tip
17. All BIG songs
18. Beware – Jay z
19. Never Scarred – Bone Crusher
20. Ante up – MOP
21. Nothin – Nore
22. La La La – Jay z
23. I just wanna – Jay z

New R + B
1. Love like this before ( all versions) Faith Evans
2. All songs by Mary J Blige
3. Frontin – Pharrell
4. Crazy in Love – beyonce
5. This is how we do it – Montell Jordon
6. Neva let you go – Syleena Johnson
7. Only you ( all versions) 112
8. Rock your body – Justin Timberlake
9. Neva Leave you Uh Oh – Lumidee
10. Jenny from the block – Jennifer Lopez

I mean, I can understand calling a few of the anthems, and maybe even locking down the b-boy classics. But all PE songs? All Eric B and Rakim songs? All Tribe Called Quest songs? All B.I.G. songs? Damn. Might as well call “All hip-hop.”

Incidentally, I got the list above from a local DJ (who will remain unnamed) who was recently asked to open for one of hip-hop’s most legendary DJs (who will remain unnamed). When I asked him what that left him with, he said “All B-more!” Good lookin’ on the bright side, yo.

So, what would YOU play?

Cross-posted to the Riddim Method